My freshman roommate from college lives in Minnesoooota. She was the reason I watched Fargo. We're still friends. Also, we came for a visit and got a little tour of this wonderful city!
1. GO TO A TWIN'S GAME. A.K.A eat a ton of food and watch the mascot game
This was not Hamburger's first baseball game. In fact, he's been a seasoned Tiger's fan from his first summer. I don't love baseball but I enjoy an afternoon at Comerica Park. But if I lived in Minneapolis, I would be a baseball fan. I would be a hard core baseball fan. Not because of the tight pants or butt slaps and not even for the fireworks. But for the food. OH MY GOD the food! There is a concession every ten feet, and not just any concession, but gourmet concessions, deep fried everything concessions (it is Minnesota, after all), and I even saw an urban farm concession. We opted for donuts and brats and garlic fries and pies. I could go on but I don't want to reveal how big of a closet fatty I am. It takes a big closet though.
I couldn't keep Hamburger away from the donuts. And I wasn't going to pass on them for his sake either. Be warned child: This was your first and last experience with donuts, hope you enjoyed it.
And make sure to get to the stadium early as to not miss the mascot game! Who wouldn't want to see a Christmas tree and Mr. Suds n' Bubbles with no arms running around trying to play baseball?! Sometimes they even get hit and fall over! It's a tough act to follow, Twins. Hamburger was thoroughly enthralled in the action.
2. NICKELODEAN UNIVERSE, MALL OF AMERICA.
Why does a mall have a theme park in it? And an aquarium and a comedy house and mini golf and a mirror maze? Because it gets COLD in Minnesota, that's why. They also have tunnels connecting their downtown buildings to parking garages. Smart.
I don't care how old you are you will find something to do at Mall of America. We only went to Nickelodean Universe for a bit (until Hamburger dragged me on four levels of escalators) but you could easily spend an entire cold or rainy day here and not run out of activities, and not even step foot into a store for that matter.
Be sure to check out the website to see all of the events they have going on... there are TONS! If you are visiting with a toddler there are Toddler Tuesdays filled with discounts and shows and events for the little guys and chicks.
We met Sponge Bob and Squidward (Hamburger was less than thrilled) and rode a few of the kiddy rides.
Don't be fooled by my timid photos... Nickelodeon Universe boasts roller coasters and other adrenaline junky rides as well as a high ropes course and even a log chute! And I don't know about you, but I'm getting old and even the kiddy rides were making me nauseous. I totally do better on roller coasters though... I'm still cool.
3. Minneapolis Sculpture Garden
Ever see that giant spoon with a cherry that people love to get their picture taken in front of?
Yea, it's here! Along with dozens of other sculptures and flower gardens situated on this 11 acre site. That's a lot of acres for Hamburger to run around and get some energy out!
We of course loved "Arikidea"... Or the giant swing
The sculpture garden is part of the Walker Art Center which is located right across the street and houses some pretty massive contemporary art collections. They also have artsy fartsy toddler activities on Tuesdays, called Artsy Pants. And that's pretty damn cool.
4. Como Zoo & Como Town
Every kid loves the zoo. Every parent loves a free zoo (donations appreciated!). And EVERYONE loves rides and soak parks. All in one place. Oh yea and gardens and food and a carousel. Check out the Chipotle Edible Garden that harvested over 1,000 lb. of food last season!
The zoo is rather small compared to most, but hey, it's free! And frankly, I prefer a smaller zoo with a little one. So for me, it was the perfect size. And you can't beat cooling off at Como Town's Splash Zone afterwards.
5. St. Anthony Main
Visit the Minneapolis riverfront community of St. Anthony Main and enjoy the best view of the Minneapolis sky line from across the Mississippi River. There are plenty of parks and shops to wander around. You can take a bike or a trolley tour of the area, or even segways if that's what you're into. Visit St. Anthony Falls and walk on the historic Stone Arch Bridge. See the old Pillsbury factory, which held the title of the largest flour mill in the world for 40 years. And once you've thoroughly tuckered your mini-me out, sit down at one of the numerous cafes and enjoy a cocktail and gelato!
5 1/2. Sex World
Yes, apparently you can't go to Minneapolis and not visit Sex World. Actually, you can't turn 18 in Minnesota and not go to Sex World... It's like a right of passage. It's the "largest adult superstore in the midwest," yo! As in 4 stories of, wellll, you know. I KNOW YOU KNOW.
I know this is a terrible picture, but I think it's worth a mention that my MOM was so amused by this that she had to take a picture of it. And the red light is kind of fitting
And for anyone who is about to go crazy about Sex World, chill, we didn't go in, we had Hamburger with us!